Excitedly, I received the news that this weekend, we would be going to Howdens, and choosing a new kitchen!
I decided to begin this little entry with a fronted adverbial. Mainly because I can, and also because I really need to understand what my ten year-old is learning at school at the moment. If she must conjure up fronted adverbials, then so must I.
Yes, that’s right. We went to Howdens and only ordered a brand new kitchen! This was not on the agenda. We were preparing to re-jig a second-hand kitchen we’d acquired. Big Seymour was going to work his magic on it. We would make do.
But I guess Big Seymour has been thinking. I suppose Big Seymour has realised that, as he has been spending all this time, effort and money doing the place up, a botched kitchen might not do his endeavour justice. And also, Howdens had a sale on.
The upshot is that shortly before closing on Saturday, Howdens staff were met with a horde of invading Seymours, hell-bent on choosing the best kitchen for the best price, and potentially staging a sit-in until they achieved this. Or walking away.
You see, Big Seymour is indecisive. He also doesn’t like spending money. And on Saturday, he was also full of cold, and thus miserable. Yet there we were, poised and ready to do the deed. Almost.
Howdens folk are clever. They see the doubt in your eyes. It’s as if they’d heard our conversation earlier that morning, during which we tried to convince ourselves that we’d manage with the botched-together kitchen for now and fit a better one later, when we had some money. It’s as if they knew Big Seymour was in a weak and vulnerable state, and had precious little energy with which to fight the pressure… They lured us in with fresh coffee, and threw a bucket of Maltesers in the direction of the three Little Seymours who were in tow, telling them to help themselves. Then, they told us there were freebies to be had. We were theirs.
However they managed it, they got us to buy a whole new kitchen. And do you know what? I am so excited! It’ll mean we won’t have to stick one together out of the bits and pieces we’ve found dotted about. It’ll also mean that in theory, it should actually fit the room! Bonus!
Half an hour later, just after we’d arrived back at The Funny Little Bungalow, the kitchen carcasses turned up. This was suspiciously quick. And by eight o’clock that evening, the wall units were up.
All of this unexpected activity has had the overall effect of making the whole project now seem – dare I say it – like it’s nearing the end. We are not done yet, but a new kitchen is a huge step in the right direction. And today, Sunday, THE MOST EXCITING THING to date has happened. We installed a stained glass window inside the house. It is glorious, and adds a touch of pseudo Victorian charm to an otherwise bland stud wall. The window in question was rescued from a skip in Liverpool a couple of years ago, and has waited patiently in the garage until today, to be displayed once again in all its glory. My house feels like a cathedral now! I do love it so.
Little Seymour Number One doesn’t, though. She say’s it’s odd, and out of place. She claims intelligence but the child is clearly a heathen. Is GCSE Art teaching her nothing?
Wistfully, I wonder if she can even remember what a fronted adverbial is. It’s a while since she did her SATS… But if she’s that darn clever, she can help us to figure out a way to continue funding this crazy renovation venture of ours. We appear to have spent all our money.
Hey ho! At least my beautiful window was free.
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