Kids. I love them. I had spent time one morning hunting down an errant judo kit, and had placed it by the back door, from where we leave to go to school. I had prepared all the packed lunches, and lined them up on the worktop. I had forced Little Read more
Oh deary me. What was I thinking? I have gone and got myself into a real pickle and like The Sword of Damocles, that pickle is hanging over my head, threatening to engulf and annihilate me at any moment. I enjoyed being a nun in The Sound of Music. It Read more
After several failed interviews recently, I am resorting to my back-up plan, which is to be a supply teacher. Supply teaching is a funny old game. I am a qualified teacher, and as such, I have all the paperwork and qualifications to trot off to schools and deliver lessons. Scary Read more
Woe is me. I think I have made a terrible mistake. A few days ago, Mini Seymour had an optician’s appointment. She’s had a chequered history with the people at Boots. She was originally diagnosed with a suspected squint, astigmatism and short-sightedness (I think, although I can never remember the Read more
Never one to believe my own suspicions regarding how inept I am at most things, I have chosen to become a portrait painter. I have told myself – repeatedly – that I can’t paint people. I may be ok at getting a sketch down, which might resemble a person vaguely Read more
10.01.20 The day my daughter spoke those dreadful words… “What is a (I can barely bear to type it…) clitoris.” Ew. Apparently, the word features in a school drama script. A SCHOOL DRAMA SCRIPT, I TELL YOU! Knowledge of the clitoris is not something that pops up in Science, nor, Read more
I had an email a few months ago, from a peripatetic (great word!) trumpet teacher at Little Seymour Number Two’s school. The email came through late at night, and was full of praise for my child’s ability to make tunes by blowing through a brass object after a trial session Read more
On Christmas Eve, we found ourselves in Tesco. Circumstances required a last minute pharmacy call (don’t ask), and so there we were, in the slip lane on the approach to The World’s Busiest Supermarket, made all the worse for the roadworks currently affecting access to the shop, and the fact Read more
I am sorry. I have been rubbish at updating our escapades recently. But I can’t give up entirely as this blog is the only real diary I write now, and without it, I won’t remember anything in the future, such is the state of my memory at the moment. Yes, Read more
In Funny Little Bungalow terms, it is fair to say that The Budget is now well and truly depleted. We have come so far (yes, we even have a bath now!), but there is still a very long list of things yet to tackle. Big Seymour calls it his Snagging Read more